Most of this blog article was in today’s USA Today. I will provide the link to the blog and you can read it for yourself. Pete Earley is an advocate for those with mental illnesses and he is taking the stand that the few who commit violence should not stigmatize the many others with mental illnesses who do NOT commit these kinds of acts. Yes, this article is spurred by the recent Colorado shootings and the fact that so many people are jumping on the ‘Oh he MUST be crazy’ bandwagon. Anyways……

Here is the link. Feel free to let me know what you think or sign up for his site and let him know what you think.

So @TheTheologiansCafe posted an entry last night asking Xangans why they comment. My first instinct was to post something funny, but then I got to thinking about it and decided to sleep on the issue and make my own entry in response to this question. So here are the reason why I comment on Dan’s blog, or anyone else’s blog for that matter.

1. To serve a purpose: Sometimes I will post a comment to defend someone who is being attacked, or to reinforce a friend who is in the middle of a fight. Sometimes I will post to further a cause that I believe in. For instance when people started to say that the shooter in Colorado must be crazy, I stepped in and said that not everyone who is crazy commit crimes like this, and not everyone who commits violent crimes like this is crazy.

2. To try(key word) to be a good Christian: I very, very rarely swear and when I do it is because something has so chocked me that I would actually do it in real life. The last time I swore on the internet was when Theo posted about human barcodes(I mean, Germany anyone?). One of the things I try to keep in mind at all times is that as a professed Christian people are going to be watching to see how I act, react, and in general treat others with whom I interact. Do I attack them for not holding my point of view? Do I defend them in the fact of an attack for not holding the same point of view? Has there been some kind of injustice? I believe a Christian is called to step in during these kinds of times and be a bright spot in the cloudy world that is the internet.

3. To try and show that not all people who are technically ‘crazy’ are raving madmen: Everyone who follows Dan’s blog knows that I have Schizophrenia. Everyone who follows my blog knows about my Schizable posts that are modeled after the Autisable posts that can be found on the Xanga main pages. I know of a couple other people on here with serious mental illnesses that are seriously struggling to keep ahold of themselves. I want to show that it is possible to be a rational, lucid person with the right medications and that we(anyone with any kind of mental illness) are not all dangerous human beings who are a threat to society.

4. Because the internet(including Xanga) is full of anonymous hatred: Go look on youtube at some of the comments. Go look on the huffington post comment section found through the netscape.com rotating feed. There is so much anger and hatred on those sites that it is nauseating! Xanga is much better in this regard, but still has some darkness. I want to try and make sure my comments are uplifting and intentionally geared towards being a beacon of light in the darkness. I’ve seen the way people treat each other all over the internet. It’s wretched out there. And that is without the experience of being on Facebook and Twitter where cyber bullying is so rampant among teenagers and those who are still teenagers at heart.

5. To make a friend laugh: I will admit that I have been a hypocrite a time or two when it comes to being a ‘good christian’ in that I’ve used terms like ‘spooge u’ on a friend’s blog. But it was meant to make them have a laugh, not to be crass. Like I said in 4, I try to make my comments as uplifting as possible because this is a failed world that we call the internet. There has to be some decency somewhere or we’re just living in a world where life is ‘Nasty, Brutish and Short’(A mini to the first person who identifies who said that). Speaking of which….

6. Minis. Minis make people smile. So do recommendations. I’m going to start sending out a lot more minis for uplifting comments and recommendations for blog entries and comments that are a beacon in the darkness. I feel like those of us who try to stay postive in a negative world deserve to be rewarded for our efforts. If not in this life, in the next. I can’t say where your positivity comes from, but mine comes directly through faith in Jesus Christ. Which leads me to….

7. To represent him: Yes this is close to being a good christian, but not exactly the same. Being a good christian means holding your tongue, turning the other cheek and things like that. Consciously being a representative of Jesus Christ means that I must be held accountable. If you see me attacking someone for their beliefs with foul language or see my tone begin to cross the line from a casual discussion into the realm of offensive personal attacks, I want, I expect, you to call me on it. I can try to be a good steward of this responsibility, but I need other Christians to hold me accountable. In return, I will do the same for you. As representatives of Christ Jesus we are called to hold each other accountable and to wtiness in his name.

So I hope you now understand why I make the comments I do. I will not be perfect. I will slip up. But these are the standards I hold myself to whenever I make a comment. What standards do you hold yourself to? I’d like to know.

Good luck on the New York Rangers. Thanks for being the Captain.

From @lkjslain

(for fun) I want all my xanga friends to comment on this status, sharing how you met me. But, I want you to LIE. That’s right, just make it up. After your comment, copy and paste this into a new blog entry so I can do the same.

now GO!

Yet another time I got all three opponents above 100.

So I was really hoping I would win on game 100 to show off a perfectly rounded winning percentage, but I had to settle for 101. 46% isn’t too bad. Ha.

What is your favorite card game?

1. My copy of Acid Pro 7 came today.

2. My first issue of my subscription to USA Today should arrive next Tuesday

3. I’m rockin it in Hearts. Check it out:

This shows my high score and the games played as of June 30th.

This shows my complete and utter demolishing of my opponents! All three of them over 100. Mwa ha ha.

This final screenshot shows my winning the game on a shoot-the-moon score. Also, take a look at the updated number of games played and the steady 45% win percentage.

For this Schizable post I am going to cover the myth that people with schizophrenia are Lazy. I will write my own views on this subject in a second, but first I am going to quote, word for word, from the book “Schizophrenia for Dummies”. This is directly from Chapter 16: Ten Myths about Schizophrenia You Can Forget. Page 312:

“Myth #6: All People with Schizophrenia Are Just Lazy

People with schizophrenia aren’t lazy per se. However, they may appear that way due to symptoms of the illness, as well as the side effects of medications used to treat it.

People with schizophrenia often seem to lack motivation, energy, or ‘get up and go’. They find it difficult to adhere to a regular schedule; instead, they sleep too much, sleep too little, or keep irregular hours. They may show no interest in getting a job or spending their time productively – preferring to stay in bed or watch TV for endless hours. These behaviors may convey the impression that they are just lazy and unwilling to do anything for themselves.

Understandably, people get very frustrated when they see a loved one taking it easy while they struggle to make ends meet. When they try to motivate the person, they may be met with a flat ‘I don’t care’ attitude. In addition, people with schizophrenia may show little interest or concern for other people, even those they love, and have difficulty making or keeping friends, or sustaining relationships with relatives.

For a long time, these ‘negative’ symptoms were seen as side effects of psychotropic medication. This is true to some extent – but a constellation of negative symptoms is associated with the illness, including low energy, lack of interest in other people and things, and the inability to form social relationships and/or a lack of caring about social relationships.

When you understand that these symptoms are due to changes in brain chemistry and functioning, you realize how pointless it is to harangue your loved one with schizophrenia. It isn’t a matter of a flawed character or a lack of will – nor is it something she can just ‘snap out of’ on her own. However, with proper medication and other supports, negative symptoms are often manageable (although they are more resistant to treatment than positive symptoms like delusions and hallucinations).”

That is the word for word debunking provided by Jerome Levine, MD. and Irene S. Levine, PhD.

And now for my own perspective on this issue:

The very first thing I want to say about those of us dealing with the avolition(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Avolition) side of Schizophrenia is that we are NOT lazy. Period. The only ones who are in any position to make any kind of judgement calls otherwise are doctors familiar with the individual patients, and the individual patients themselves. If you have a problem with that, rededicate your life towards understanding the negative symptoms associated with schizophrenia.

Now, I shall talk about avolition as it relates to my own experience. I had a terrific job when this illness struck back in 2007. Before my first hospitalization I was, I believe, a good worker, and a reliable boss. It took months to get over the initial shock of, “I have schizophrenia.” When I came back late in 2007 or early 2008(I forget really), I was a completely different worker. I was frequently absent as I had no motivation to get out of bed and felt no responsibility for my actions. When I was at work I couldn’t sit still longer than an hour and so I took a LOT of fifteen minute breaks to go peruse the library stacks. I was a terrible employee and was eventually fired.

At my apartment I would either sleep or watch TV all day long. I was way too full of anxiety to do anything like write or read or even listen to music. Only, and I do mean only, in the past year have things begun to change. Now I listen to music, read a lot of books, and have taken up writing again and am working on a book of my own. So it took five years to expand just to the point where I would read, write, and listen to music. That’s as far as I’ve come in five years. Starting Thursday I will expand a little more to my other one-time hobby and begin creating music again.

But really, that is all I do during the day. I will take today as an example. I wrote these words in my journal around 9 AM, shortly after I got up. Then I copied a few of my older homemade CD’s onto my Amazon.com Cloud Drive. And now I am copying these words onto this blog post. This is all I will do today besides eat, sleep, and watch sports. That’s it. I watch much more TV than is healthy. And I will soon subscribe to USA Today to help me keep up with world events. Ta Da! That’s Shadowrunner81. That’s the real me. I have avolition, and it is a bastard. I have no motivation to get a real job, just a little motivation to keep up with a few hobbies. Welcome to one of the nastier sides of Schizophrenia.

-Shadowrunner81(Dan)

If you would like to know more about my illness Here is the first Schizable blog post where I introduce you to it.

If you would like to know more about me outside of my illness Here is my introductory post.

I just bought Acid Pro 7.0. I own 5 from 7 years ago and made some wonderful songs. Now I own an updated version and will begin making music the day it arrives. . If you want to know what this music creation software looks like, here is a youtube video that features similar software. I cannot describe how happy I am right now.

So last Thursday evening I spent a nice night with my Dad and youngest brother watching How to Train Your Dragon and, you know, it was just an all around pleasant evening. One of the things I talked to my Dad about was coming down to his place again for his next communion service. I haven’t been to a communiion service in years and I just felt it was time I went to one.

Then Friday comes around and we have a great cookout around 1 and eat grilled chicken, corn on the cob, and macaroni and cheese. YUM! So we visit for a little bit after the food settles and eventually it is time for my brother and me to go as we had plans to visit our other brother(he’s in the middle) at his place at 5. So it’s a nice trip back for the most part when, about 4:30, my Mom gives me a call and tells me there are some major storms coming in. My brother and I look out the car windows while driving on I-71 and see nothing. So we don’t worry too much. Then a few minutes later my Mom calls and says she’s leaving work early to avoid it.

Now we’re getting a little worried, but other than a slight tinge of grey down south, we still don’t see anything. So it’s getting to be about 10 til 5 and our Mom calls to say it is really REALLY nasty for her on her trip home and the most I can say is to stay safe but since she’s on the highway on the way home she can’t exactly pull over or who knows who might run into her stopped on the highway in pitch black darkness. Ugh. Then, then my brother and I start to see some dark clouds to the West. Great.

But up until that point we had only had maybe four drops of rain so we’re thinking that maybe we can get to our brother’s place before this thing hits. Nope. He tries to call us a couple time and we try to call him once we see that our direction is taking us straight into the path of the storm. No connection. We try texting…nothing. So we get to broad street and BAM…wind. Wind. WIND. The car is rocking and we’re stuck in traffic maybe 5 minutes away from our brother’s house. I just tell my youngest brother that no matter what we run into, I’m right here with you. He looked at me wierd but I know he appreciated that. I don’t drive as many of you know so I have no experience driving though the hell we went through. He’s only 21 so he’s just a kid when it comes to driving experience. But boy he got some during the time we were exposed to the storm. We had to dodge orange barrels that were in the road. We watched as the lightpoles blew up and sparks flew. We watched as the streetlights went out and people treated four way stops as their own personal, “I’m going NOW!!!” zones. Oy.

So the wind and the rain are hurricane force according to the radio. 82 and higher mile per hour winds. By the time we got to our brother’s house he had lost power and so he had manually opened the garage door and we parked inside. It was about 5:10 at this point. The storm was nasty, brutish, and short(if you get that you get a mini). So it didn’t last too much longer once we got to his place. BUT, we had nothing to do except play cards by candlelight. So we played phase 10 just the three of us. My sister in law was away for the evening. It was supposed to be a nice brother get together where we got Bob Evans take out and enjoyed a Netflix movie or something. It ended up being much more memorable.

About halfway through Phase 10 we were all beginning to get hungry so we talked about what would be wise in light of the fact that we had no power, and likely most of the people around broad street were also without power. My middle brother and I decided to go to Wendy’s while my middle brother watched Leonard, middle brother’s dog.

Wendy’s! Oh man. We went on broad street and EVERY food place had, like, 25-35 cars in the drive through. So I tell my middle brother to just park and we’ll go inside rather than waste gas in the drive through. Keep in mind the storm has passed. So we go in there and there we waited for at least an hour for the food. It was just so freakin busy. I paid for it since I had already told my middle brother I’d pay for the Bob Evans meal.

So we get back, and eat, and I won at Phase 10 and then middle brother teaches youngest brother and me a game called Sevens. He won every time since he knew the strategies but we’ll play some more in the future. Eventually it started getting dark and youngest brother and I left for home.

When we got home there was power. No internet or cable though. We got very very lucky since the line of house just across the street was without it(and was until yesterday!). My youngest brother works at a Home Depot, Lowes, Menards type store so he went to work the next day and said they were swamped with people wanting generators.

For myself? I kept my laptop plugged in and played computer games for the most part. I have attached a picture of my new all time low score in hearts.

One! Can you believe that? And note the date….6/30/12. Mwa ha ha. So other than that I just read a lot and wrote some in my personal journals. Eventually we got internet and cable back and, as of now, all but about 10,000 Franklin county customers have power.

So that was my weekend. How was yours?

Hey, I’m in the middle of some major storms. I have power and internet at the moment, but don’t know how long it will last. Will update more when I can.